08 November, 2008

i wish california would make up its mind already


hot or cold. not both. i dont like having to remove my sweatshirt while riding into work at 745 in the morning. in november. because its hot. at least the mid west has it figured out. too bad it kinda sucks there.

24 October, 2008

a booze free weekend. oh boy.

just cruising thru the oldies i had lying around in the virtual world of photobucket. cause my scanner is poop right now and scans all fuzzy and dumb. but i found this gem here. fitting for these times i suppose. but i drew this as an idontneednostinkingmoney drawering when i wasnt working. mo money mo problems. i need to get me some mo money then.
ps working is dumb too.


06 October, 2008

out of this world


starting to scan in the newerish stuff. partying will cause a slight road block. as will work. eventually new stuff. new stuff eventually. but til then, heres nine pairs of boobs. all for you.

02 October, 2008

scanning in progress

updating my life. since i have gotten a new computer charger. and gotten my stuff. and have a place to stay. but first i am scanning the polaroids from the bike trip. and then i have 3 or 4 sketch books from the same amount of months to be scanned. also. lousy american. i puked last night.

02 September, 2008

wood. with lead in it.

i cant lie and say i never use them cause that would be lying. i do try to avoid using them as much as a i can. i am a closet pencil racist. cant help it. would you believe me if i said i was using one right now. cause i'm not. but maybe if i had three arms i would be using a pencil. but if i had three arms i wouldn't be holding onto a pencil while i was typing. i wouldn't even hold onto a pen. that would be a waste of a good limb. i would hold something cool. like my wiener.

16 August, 2008

finally an internet connection so strong i could shit

trips over. started work. computer shit the bed. stuff up eventually. send money.

24 July, 2008

have you ever been bored....on weeeeed.

love comes.

love goes.

deal with it.


08 July, 2008

sometimes i hear things. sometimes i dont hear anything. sometimes i lie. i heard that.

and sometimes i use exclamation points as the only form of punctuation. it works. right? RIGHT!

04 July, 2008

for you america. on your birthday.


heres to getting crispy at the beach and throwing back some beers. and wasting. everything.

29 June, 2008

old and bad. THEM pt.6.


oh how i miss the good old days back when i was a stick figure.

24 June, 2008

old and bad. THEM pt.5. aint too young to make babies


just a couple of neighborhood kids. gettin down. about to pay child support.

20 June, 2008

old and bad. THEM pt. 4. rex.


peer pressure can be really hard on some people. hard on...

04 June, 2008

me ride you long time

i will have you between my legs for nineteen hundred and some odd miles. vancouver on down into meheco. spandex and buff legs here i come. i got some oldies set for future posting. i got my point and shoot with me. and if i can get to a computer ill put em up. why i need to post them is beyond me. ill already have the pictures in front of me. i guess this way i can see it bigger. thats it. thats why i post stuff on this page. my eyes must be shot. they're not. but hey. youre not looking at them. you dont even know that this has been typed. you wanna know how i know. because you havent even looked...see.

30 May, 2008

you know what would be fucking sweet?

it would be fucking sweet if some famous person, i dont care who even though i think mathew perry could do it, were to use their star power for good and use it to take down bono. that sun glass wearing, talk to muching, trying to make a difference dillweed. u2 sucks. always has. always will. won't someone please blow his head off with x ray vision. i wish christopher reeves were still alive cause i think i could get him to fly around and find bono and blow his head up with some x ray vison. oh, if only super powers were real.


25 May, 2008

i did it. i killed your cat.

i wouldn't even worry about the cat dude. they get nine lives. and i think this one only makes it seven. maybe eight. or nine...maybe your beloved whiskers isn't coming back. sorry dude. i think it is dead.

14 May, 2008

i've been feeling a little suicidal lately

i mean, all i wanted was a pepsi. just one pepsi. and she wouldnt give it to me.

so i went ahead and drew three. but only this ones for you. like a budweiser. a non alcoholic budweiser. enjoy.

11 May, 2008

does any one care


i had been away from a scanner when i drew up this drawering and got my ticket, so i'll back date it, but...i got a fucking 138 dollar parking ticket a few weeks ago, back when i was in phoenix, on a car that i haven't driven in over a year and a half. cost as much as my flight to vancouver..fucking phx parking cops in their three wheels chariots of shit. go die...

09 May, 2008

if this is the way it has to be. so be it.

i wanna to be a lumber jack one day...it probably wont happen until i can officially grow me some amazing facial hair...and all the lumberjacks at the lumberjack office will laugh at me because of my lack of manly facial hair...and they'll send me away until i grow a mans beard...or at the very least a mans mustache...i might have to pull a hulk hogan and dye my facial hair all sweet and manly...i bet worms will be crawling through my body eating at my inarrds before i can grow a proper mustache...bummer

01 May, 2008

welcome to may. welcome to nowhere

its where we're all heading...and i'll be there waiting...for you...naked...thigh deep in tofu...

28 April, 2008

attempted unicorn?

do you think you could still get into heaven if you try to attempt unicorn? is there a heaven? lets ask the panda.
no wait. hes dead.

23 April, 2008

drawed on

the dude who drew this is named patrick jilbert...and it originally came from a skate deck from an art show...and when i saw the photo of said skateboard i said oh. that skateboard is rectangular in shape. much like my chest. i shall have some one who has never given a tattoo to give me a tattoo i thought to myself...(crappy line quality was a must)...steven would you like to draw on my body i ask. steven: sure kalen. i would gladly draw on your body...i replied with sweet...silently i must have said uh oh. but uh oh did not over power sweet in the end because now i have a tattoo of a skull. with wings. and snake legs. on my body..these are tophers photos...from pretty pictures. he shot this with a fancy camera. it doesn't show

check it...

21 April, 2008

chug! freshman chug!


wow. one beer three panels...hot damn

17 April, 2008

the beatles were a bunch of fuckin liars...parts 1,2,3,4,5,6,and 7

its too bad i hate working and will never own these things...other than the stereo...and the incredible hulk gloves. they rule.

im not...but you might be

looking at this drawing reminds me of that justin timberlake song, cry me a river. you know the one with that britney spears knock off. i like knock offs. i wanna hang out with britney spears. she has a ll the good drugs im sure of it. we could go in the hot tub. and i would throw compliments her way and she would blush and be like oh kalen, heres some drugs. and id be all like. oh sweet. thanks britney. i cant believe people think you're nuts. i mean, here we are sitting in a hot tub. doing drugs. and i just met you. you're not crazy. you're awesome. high five!

15 April, 2008

a little sumpin sumpin


growing up i used to only drink strawberry shakes....but now that i am all growed up, i prefer chocolate ones. so i drew you a chocolate one.

13 April, 2008

mama says they was magic shoes...


they could take me anywhere.

11 April, 2008

i apologize


i was starving and couldn't wait any longer

07 April, 2008

its true

they dont...i know this because i have a zombie...and i dont call him anything...
i also dont back the pages when i scan things...its like a special birthday party...where you like, get like, two gifts instead of one gift...hooray! like, you rule.

05 April, 2008

a quarter past the new year


i drew this because i bought three new sketch books from the lovely lovely wal mart...i should have bought me some new crayons while i was there...